Horseburgers

Horseburgers

‘We have three people here today to try and make some sense of this issue with horse meat finding its way into beefburgers. They are Mr Tegwin Floggit who is the Meat Products Technical Manager for the supermarket where this first came to light, Ms Valerie Twitter who is the chair of the Equine Defence League and Dr Henry Protein who is an expert on animal DNA testing at the University of  Upper Berkhampstead.

      Welcome to everyone and perhaps I can start with you Valerie. May I call you Valerie?’

      ‘Yes, of course you may John.’

      ‘So tell us Valerie, why is it wrong to eat horses, after all they do so regularly in several European countries and most other four legged farm animals are happily consumed by the majority of the UK population?’

      ‘At the EDH, we feel it is just as wrong to eat horses as it is, say, to eat dogs.’

      ‘Well I am sure the Koreans wouldn’t agree with you. What do we do with the old racehorses, and horses that have been kept as pets when they are no longer wanted? Surely most owners would rather sell them to a slaughter house for about £200 rather than having to pay the same sum to have them put down by a vet? I believe we export over ten thousand horses, either live or as carcases to Europe each year?’

      ‘We are also against this trade.’

      ‘So I ask you again Valerie, what do we do with these 10,000 horses each year? Do we pay to have them put in old horses homes or perhaps fed on grass in a meadow and brought in each winter with all the feed costs etc.? Would the EDL be willing to pay for this?’

      ‘No John. We are a small organisation and we certainly couldn’t afford to do that.’

      ‘OK then, your line is that you are just complaining and feel something should be done – you don’t know what and you aren’t prepared to pay anything towards a solution?’

      ‘Well, errm umm, I suppose so.’

‘If I can turn to you now Henry. How can you tell the difference between horse meat and beef once it has been incorporated into a burger?’

      ‘The only way, once it has been minced, is by DNA testing.’

      ‘How do you do that?

      ‘We use a bank of PCR machines to amplify the genome up to an quantity where we can extract the DNA, inject it into a gel and then compare the result with reference samples to confirm if it is pure beef or has been contaminated with horse meat.?

      ‘Is this a reliable method?’

      ‘Oh yes, murderers have been sent to prison for life using the same method.’

      ‘For making horse burgers?’

      ‘No, of course not, it is not illegal to sell horse meat in the UK.’

      ‘It is a very reliable test then?’

      ‘Yes, of course, but no method is foolproof, there is always human error.’

      ‘So why don’t you just have a panel of tasters who can taste the difference between beef and horse meat?’

      ‘That would be a lot less reliable as horsemeat tastes very similar to beef – in fact some people say it tastes better.’

      ‘Does no harm come to people that eat horses?’

      ‘No, the most dangerous part is catching them, we used to regularly eat horses in the UK until about a hundred years ago.’

      ‘Steady there doctor, people will be getting the idea that you scientists have a sense of humour.’

‘Now then Mr Floggit. If horse meat tastes so good, does you no harm and there is a ready supply of dead horses you can flog, what’s all the fuss about?’

      ‘Please call me Tegwin, John. The issue is not so much the presence of horse meat in our burgers, it is the fact that it is not declared on their labels so is illegal to sell them in the UK. We take our labelling very seriously and strive to ensure that our customers are buying what it says on the label.’

      ‘I don’t see why you take that so seriously as the Prime Minister doesn’t. Oops, sorry, I shouldn’t say thinks like that. I don’t think Desperate Dan would be too happy changing from his favourite cow pie to cow pie with perhaps a bit of horse and possibly even a smidge of pig, do you?

      Every supermarket says that they take all this very seriously but surely the truth is that you want to sell some burgers so your buyers traipse around the back street meat producers until they find the cheapest burgers, bung the producer a few HACCP forms to complete, call it due diligence and you make a huge profit selling Dobbin to your customers ground up into gritty burgers?’

      ‘No that is a complete misrepresentation of what happens. We take the auditing of our suppliers very seriously.’

      ‘I’m sure you take everything very seriously Tegwin, you don’t strike me as a jocular man. What is HACCP by the way?’

      ‘It stands for Hazard Analysis of Critical Control Points. It’s way of ensuring the production of quality products. The complete process is analysed and broken down into its constituant steps. The hazardous points are identified and procedures  put in place to mitigate those risks.’

      ‘I see. So your HACCP for burger production would include a mitigation to the mincing part that says, Ensure no horses trot into the mincing area?’

      ‘That is being a little flippant but, in essence, yes that is the principle.’

      ‘And do you have any metal detectors on the line to remove any horse shoes that may have found their way in to the mince?’

      ‘Well, yes, we do have metal detectors on all the lines but surely it would be bad luck to remove any horse shoes?

      ‘Whoah there Tegwin, you are supposed to be taking this very seriously, remember? Now, while we are all taking this very seriously, is it true that the first indication of a problem came from a warehouseman at the burger producer who was unloading the beef carcases when he coughed and said that he felt a little horse?’

      ‘I’m not aware of that occurrence although we do take the health of our supplier’s employees very…/’

      ‘Seriously – yes, I know Tegwin. I’m afraid we will have to leave it there. Thank you all for coming onto the twoday programme this morning.’

     

‘Now over to Rob Bonnet who has the runners at Lingfield today, if they haven’t all been eaten off course – or even on course, who knows? Perhaps we should start taking all this very seriously.’